It’s been a while since I wrote something. I miss writing. How should I start? What should I say?
The past few weeks have been a very reflective. I don’t know why but I kept thinking about the future. You know me, I am not a planner. I don’t have concrete plans about my future so every time I think of the future I feel uncomfortable. Maybe I’m over thinking.
Life is short. Life is a mystery. Life surprises us. It catches us off guard.
I just finished reading things I wrote a few years back and I can’t believe I’ve written such. I’d like to share a few excerpts here.
He lost someone. He then realized what was long been said by people, what was long been written on books, what was long been a maxim. He realized that life can be taken away in a blink of an eye. No signs. No premonitions. No warnings. Life was lost. That moment changed his life. It was a major turning point. He changed. He felt the need to change.He felt like anyone can be taken away from him at any moment. He felt weak. He can do nothing. He realized that sometimes there are no “next times” He decided to tell what he felt towards people. He decided to be vocal about his feelings. He decided to let others know how they affect his life. He was afraid of losing someone again. He was afraid. There even came a time that paranoia messed up his mind. Thoughts of losing people kept popping out. He felt really useless and weak. All he could say was “Take care.”
Sometimes, when they are all together, he feels this overwhelming joy. There’s this certain euphoria that hit him. Whenever this happened, he just thanked God for making him alive. It was one of those times when he was able to say,
“This is life.”
Maybe, sometimes, those significant people in your life wonder if they ever have been meaningful in your life, if you appreciate the things they do for you. Maybe they wonder if you miss them when you’re not together, if you think of them when they are not around. Maybe they wonder if you notice their efforts, if you notice their care. Maybe they wonder when they think of you, do you ever think of them too. Maybe they wonder if they made an impact in your life.
Maybe they need to hear those assuring words from you. Maybe they need those words right now. Maybe, just maybe, they doubt themselves, doubt their self-worth. And you’re assuring words may give them salvation.
Actions speak louder than words, they say. But sometimes words give us the certainty of what the actions really meant. Sometimes simple words of encouragement and words of appreciation help us get back up on our feet. Sometimes we crave for praises and compliments. And sometimes we want to hear them coming from the persons who mean so much to us.
It feels good to visit my old self through reading these words. I feel proud of my old self. For her to be able to say such things. It makes me smile.
I hope to write again. I hope my future self will be proud of me also. God willing, I live a number of years He only knows.
Lord, help us open ourselves for Your blessings. May it come in a form we like or not. May we be aware of your love always. You are our hope. Thank you for saving us.
Thank you for this life. Thank you for holding on to us. Thank you for never letting go.